How to spoil a princess (on a budget)

As you know, princesses do love to be spoiled. You might say it's our one vice. But if you're like a lot of people in this economy, you might be worried about keeping (or getting) that special princess in your life. So I've written the following to show you that anyone can afford to keep a princess in the lifestyle she expects.

Love is cheap. Don't be stingy with it. Smiles are free, don't hoard them. Give your kisses away, the ones you get in return will be worth infinitely more than any you could buy.

"Tripe!" you say. "Nothing but romantic drivel! Princesses are materialistic!" I must admit that we are. Personally I expect so many gifts I need a chest to hold them all.

You could build that chest yourself. A little wood and a lock so all your princess's treasures remain safe. Here are a few suggestions on how to fill it.

Give your princess wild flowers you picked yourself. Or better yet, take her where the wild flowers grow. Pick only one and put it in her hair. Why not a dozen roses? They'll be forgotten in a week. But years from now, you'll see that flower again. It will be in the pages of her favorite book, the beautiful hardcover edition you gave her. You know that book. The one you told her you happened across accidentally, when actually you spent a month trying to hunt it down. That wild flower will be there. Check the chapter where the protagonist and her hero declare their love for each other. If it's not there, then check in the dirty sexy part of the book. =)

Don't waste your princess's time with gaudy things made of metal and stone. Instead, take you princess star gazing and give her the treasures of the stars. Give each and every one to her and they will be hers forever. What's that? You don't think you have the right to give her the stars? Just try it, and I dare you to find someone who could take them away from her.

Give your princess the finest thing to wear. Designer shoes? $300 jeans? Oh my no. Give her your love and she'll wear it always. The smile on her lips, the glow on her face, and the goosebumps on her skin when she thinks of you.

But maybe you don't believe me. I know there's no way to convince you, so you'll just have to try it yourself. Try all these things on the next princess you see and tell me I'm wrong. If she doesn't feel spoiled, there is only one explanation. She is not really a princess.